150926 Thank you for working in mysterious ways

Installation work by Gary Baseman @ Drake 150; sorry if it's a little creepy. 

God really works in mysterious ways.

It was one of my closest friend's birthday dinner party tonight. Although I knew most of the people who came to the party, I'm not personally close with them. There was this one girl, whom I met back in January, at the birthday girl's engagement party. Since then, it was my first time seeing her.

We were catching up on how things were going in our lives. I got a chance to briefly talk to her about my mission trip to Cambodia. I also mentioned how I am interested in going there for a long term. As I was sharing, she seemed intrigued by it and she also shared how she has a group of friends who do humanitarian work in Cambodia. I asked her if they were part of a non-profit organization but she said that they don't belong to a group. Rather, they did it voluntarily and funded themselves with the money out of their own pockets. Their vision was to build libraries to make facilities to expand people's interest in learning, as the majority of scholars and educated people were killed during the Khmer Rouge. I was really curious to what her friends were doing but I didn't get much chance to talk to her as she was sitting at a distant from me. We had to quickly wrap up our conversation, but she said something that really surprised me.

She said that she is willing to support me if I were to do any missionary work. I was honestly shocked when she said that because, not many people have verbally told me that they are willing to financially help me. I've received tremendous amount of financial help from friends around me, and from my church and I am extremely grateful for their generosity. However, as the support was coming from someone who I barely know, and who barely knows me, I think that's what made me surprised. On top of that, I don't think she's a Christian. Not to say that non-Christian don't like to support me or anything, but generally speaking, I think unbelievers often don't like help Christian clubs? Don't get me wrong, I am really thankful just by what she said.

As I am writing my blog, I'm coming to realize how God works in mysterious ways. On top of that, I'm wondering if this is God answering my prayers. One of the biggest reasons that hinder me from going to Cambodia for a longer term is financial help. No, I didn't receive financial help from anyone or anywhere. But I wonder if this is a preview of God's financial provision for me, so that I can trust in Him more.

I'm not in a place to rush myself to make a decision. So I pray earnestly and fervently to seek God's will for me.

150618 Thank you for inviting me to go on missions

"But because I knew God and had the privilege to worship Him, to "talk of all His wondrous love and care," I was thankful for every day I answered that prison roll call, for every day I was still alive."

-From Barnabas Mam's Church Behind the Wire

Are you surprised?
I hope it was a pleasant surprise.
I've been away from my blog for the longest time I think... and I thought I would post something new today because there's something I'd like to share.

I am going to Cambodia this summer for a short term mission trip with my church. In preparation for the missions, our team is reading a book called "Church Behind the Wire" by Barnabas Mam. Barnabas is one of 200 Christians who survived Killing Fields during Khmer Rouge regime in Cambodia in the 70s. The book is his testimony of how he became a Christian from a Buddhist and a communist. His conversion story is a miracle, but how he survived the Killing Fields is also a miracle as Barnabas worshiped God day after day while he was imprisoned. I just started reading the book, so I don't know the whole story yet. However, I'm already impacted by Barnabas' story. It's almost a shock to me to see how Barnabas was able to praise God and to be thankful for every day in the midst of the torture and what he had to go through during his imprisonment. It makes me angry at myself for not being able to do the same, especially when I'm no where near being persecuted. My lack of knowledge and interest to know this sad history of Cambodia make me frustrated as well. This country is so close to my motherland... and this happened when my parents were young. This is not too long ago. It's been less than 50 years ago that this happened. It is so shocking to know that the world didn't respond to Cambodia right away. I don't know much about the history (and I'm no historian) so I can't say anything confidently, but based on what I read so far it seems like the world wasn't actively helping.

I'm really torn and burdened by the victims from the Khmer Rouge genocide. When I first looked into this history, I deeply grieved and was speechless. However, after seeing some pictures of the Killing Frields Museum and of the victims, it's pushing my emotions to another level. I think I'm gonna have a hard time falling asleep tonight.